O is for Originality: A-Z Relationships

A true relationship is two unperfect people refusing to give up on each other – Unknown.

Originality

Okay, so I might be reaching a little with the word originality, but it was very difficult to think of an O word! However, the definition of originality is the ability to think independently and creatively and I think that both of these qualities are needed in a good relationship. 

Independent thinking

Some couples lose their ability to think independently once they have been together for a while. One person becomes the thinker of the two and speaks for them, making all of the decisions. This is not healthy as although it is important to consult with each other on big decisions, you should not lose your voice to your partner. I know people who have to ask their partner if they can buy things, go places, even watch TV shows. It is ridiculous! No one should have that kind of power over someone. 

Equally, no one should give their power away and let someone take over their choices and speak for them. I remember one older couple who would visit my mum when I was a child and every time someone asked the man a question, the woman would answer. Even as a child, I thought that it was ridiculous and I used to wonder why the man would allow his voice to be spoken for him. 

woman placing duct tape on her mouth - no voice
When you have no voice in a relationship

 

A good relationship is where both partners feel comfortable thinking independently, consulting each other on more important matters. Relationships should be equal and no one should be in charge of the other.

Creative thinking

The ability to think creatively is also important, as without this a relationship can get really boring very quickly. You do not want to get stuck in a routine which repeats twenty-four seven, as you will likely feel like you are suffocating. Just to clarify, I am not knocking routine. I love routines, lists and planning things so that is not what I am talking about.

What I mean, is a relationship which stays the same. For example, a couple who have been together for a few years find themselves in a pattern of work, sleep repeat and they only talk about the same things, have sex the same way, even eat the same meals, over and over again! 

man sitting on red fire hydrant looking very bored
Life is too short to be in a relationship that bores you

You can see how this would become boring. A good relationship needs a bit of creativity to shake things up every once in a while so that things do not get stale

Diversity: The art of thinking independently together – Malcome S Forbes.

A couple looking at the sea in each others arms and heart shaped red and pink balloons
Relationship series

This post is part of my blog series: The A-Z of a Healthy and Happy Relationship.

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